Wives, love your husbands, unconditionally! Is this really a thing???

Queens...now I know that you all can relate to the "unconditional" love thing we often hear so much about. Whether it be your pastor, your imam, your mother, your grandmother...someone has expressed the importance of you loving your man unconditionally leaving some of us feeling at a loss when we are not happy. Well, the purpose of this post is to tell you that love is only unconditional when it is deserved!

I don't care what religion you follow or who your momma is, no one has been placed on this earth to be abused and mistreated! If you find that you are in a relationship where you are unhappy more than you are happy, then it is imperative for you to reevaluate your relationship.

I've had so many women sit in a chair in my office and express their relationships with so much pain, confusion, and a bunch of contradictions. A man who cheats may love you but he is not in love with you. A man who belittles you is not capable of loving you. A man who puts his hands on you is incapable of loving himself so definitely cannot love you.

Based on the more common complaints I've heard from women lately, here are a few possible issues you may want to consider as a red flag....

1. If you communicate your feelings to your significant other and he is unable to listen, this is a huge problem. When I say listen, I don't mean with his ears. He must show you he is listening through his actions. If he works on making necessary changes that will help you feel secure, loved, and important, then he is worth staying around for.

2. If you have a man who spends more time hanging in the streets, or wherever he claims to be, instead of bringing his behind home, then you've got a possible no-gooder on your hands. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying he shouldn't chill with friends, but it should be within reason and no matter what he is doing, he should always prefer to be with you.

3. ​ If your significant other does more tearing you down than he does building you up. You for sure need to run the other way! Relationships, of any kind, should be about building, both together and individually. If you are dealing with someone who does not share positive advice, encourage you, support you, and even participate in your life in such ways that can assist you in your growth, then you are asking for nothing but stress, frustration, pain...and even stagnation. Your man should consider you his Queen, hold you down when you need it most, and walk by your side even when you are strong. The two of you should communicate regularly, discuss your daily and future plans, always ensuring that you are on the same page and growing TOGETHER. He should never hurt you, never turn his back on you, never allow any harm to come to you...by NO one, and should always, always make you smile!

Disclaimer: I am not pointing fingers and telling you to leave your man! What I am saying is that you need to evaluate and reevaluate your relationship. And Queens, please remember that you are NOT perfect! You too may have issues that you need to work on. It takes two to have a great relationship, there are two sides to every story and your story is not always the real story.

Queendom Rising!